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My Out of Bed Morning "limp"
Have you ever seen one of those cartoon characters with a wooden leg cut to short and a horrible "limp" in their walk to go with it? Just imagine lying in bed, staring at the shadow on the ceiling and wondering how bad your "limp" is going to be when you get out of your bed to walk to the bathroom. I may not have a wooden leg, but this dreaded daily reoccurring event is the first reminder in my day that I have "It." I begin by stretching my toes as straight out as I can get them before I ever move from my position. I then flex my feet, pointing my toes up towards my chest, down towards the bottom of the bed, repeat and hold, repeat and hold, repeat and hold. It is at this point my cat (Kee-kee) 
thinks I am playing with her and like a silent sniper, she pounces out of nowhere, onto the bed, rips a hole into my down comforter with her teeth and tiny goose feathers go flying everywhere! Did you know those little feathers are easily inhaled through the mouth into the throat when your screaming at your cat at 0500 in the morning? Now, where was I, oh yes....the "limp." While I stare at the clock in pure disgust from tossing and turning all night, I now sit up in the bed and get what I think is a good stretch to the back of my legs. I place one foot down onto the carpet, then the other, take a long deep breath, (as if this is going to help), slowly stand up and quickly turn around to lean back onto the bed to relieve the onset of immediate foot pain from standing up. Here is the tricky part, I have to go pee. Yes, I said "pee." My bathroom is about 10' from my bed and up four steps + another 5' to the toilet. 
Ya, I know what your thinking....don't ask, that is just how the house was built. (see the picture) So, here I go, "limp", owww, "limp", owww, grab the hand rail to help pull myself up the stairs, bigger "limp" OWWWW. In my mind I'm telling myself, just get to the toilet and the foot pain will stop! Hurry, hurry, get there...owww. I get there, stop, look at the toilet and realize I have to sit down...Well, guess what, I don't sit down anymore, I plop down. Why? Because "It" is also in my knee joints. Needless to say, regardless of the pain in my feet and ankles, I successfully make this little journey every morning to "pee" and every morning I continue to dread my morning "limp."
thinks I am playing with her and like a silent sniper, she pounces out of nowhere, onto the bed, rips a hole into my down comforter with her teeth and tiny goose feathers go flying everywhere! Did you know those little feathers are easily inhaled through the mouth into the throat when your screaming at your cat at 0500 in the morning? Now, where was I, oh yes....the "limp." While I stare at the clock in pure disgust from tossing and turning all night, I now sit up in the bed and get what I think is a good stretch to the back of my legs. I place one foot down onto the carpet, then the other, take a long deep breath, (as if this is going to help), slowly stand up and quickly turn around to lean back onto the bed to relieve the onset of immediate foot pain from standing up. Here is the tricky part, I have to go pee. Yes, I said "pee." My bathroom is about 10' from my bed and up four steps + another 5' to the toilet. 
Ya, I know what your thinking....don't ask, that is just how the house was built. (see the picture) So, here I go, "limp", owww, "limp", owww, grab the hand rail to help pull myself up the stairs, bigger "limp" OWWWW. In my mind I'm telling myself, just get to the toilet and the foot pain will stop! Hurry, hurry, get there...owww. I get there, stop, look at the toilet and realize I have to sit down...Well, guess what, I don't sit down anymore, I plop down. Why? Because "It" is also in my knee joints. Needless to say, regardless of the pain in my feet and ankles, I successfully make this little journey every morning to "pee" and every morning I continue to dread my morning "limp."
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